Shower Like A Woman

[Cympil]

Take off clothes and place them sectioned in the laundry basket according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it is clean.

Condition your hair with conditioner enhanced with grapefruit and mint.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mould spots with tile cleaner.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in a super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and the hand towel on head.

If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

[Guest MONGO]

shower like a man

Take off clothes and place them on the floor

Walk to bathroom wearing ya boxers

If you see wife along the way, scratch ya balls whilst farting

Look at your manly physique in the mirror whilst rotating ya winky like a helicopter

take off boxers

Get in the shower.

Use sponge,

Wash your hair once with shampoo

Wash your face with soap or lynx shower gel

Wash entire rest of body with soap or lynx shower gel

wash armpits !*!@# balls and winky

Turn off shower.

Get out of shower.

Dry with ya towel

Return to bedroom wearing ya boxers

If you see your wife along the way, drop ya kegs and give her one

[Blank]

[Pete]

shower like a man

Take off clothes and place them on the floor

Walk to bathroom wearing ya boxers

If you see wife along the way, scratch ya balls whilst farting

Look at your manly physique in the mirror whilst rotating ya winky like a helicopter

take off boxers

Get in the shower.

Use sponge,

Wash your hair once with shampoo

Wash your face with soap or lynx shower gel

Wash entire rest of body with soap or lynx shower gel

wash armpits !*!@# balls and winky

Turn off shower.

Get out of shower.

Dry with ya towel

Return to bedroom wearing ya boxers

If you see your wife along the way, drop ya kegs and give her one

There is an easier way than that, I walk to the canal jump in, splash about and lie on the bank until the sun dries me and my clothes. This saves on electricity running the shower and you wash your clothes at the same time.

[Blank]

There is an easier way than that, I walk to the canal jump in, splash about and lie on the bank until the sun dries me and my clothes. This saves on electricity running the shower and you wash your clothes at the same time.

Hahahaha, thats one way to have a wash!

[Pete]

Hahahaha, thats one way to have a wash!

Its the only way Blank, its totally refreshing in the middle of winter

[PussyKat]

we aint all like that you no!!

[PussyKat]

rotfpmsl - keep em comin

[Cympil]

we aint all like that you no!!

are you one of these lasses that just wash your 3 "f"s before you gan oot

[Mr Darn]

are you one of these lasses that just wash your 3 "f"s before you gan oot

3 'F's? i got 2 of em....

[Cympil]

3 'F's? i got 2 of em....

What two have you got? Face and feet?

[Mr Darn]

What two have you got? Face and feet?

LMAO! no, i missed feet!

[Cympil]

LMAO! no, i missed feet!

So what was the two you got then?

[Mr Darn]

So what was the two you got then?

Face and F.......ingers???

[Cympil]

Face and F.......ingers???

Aye

Wey no,actually it rhymes with nanny

[Mr Darn]

Aye

Wey no,actually it rhymes with nanny

It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun....

[Merlin]

It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun....

no thats a mazer........................it would be a mazer if it wasn't there :lol:

[Mr Darn]

no thats a mazer........................it would be a mazer if it wasn't there

My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....

Dunno what he ment tho..

[Monsta®]

My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....

Dunno what he ment tho..

so a tek it you never found the end of the rainbow?  

[Pete]

It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun....

Pluto?

[Pete]

My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....

Dunno what he ment tho..

Confused please explain?

[Mr Darn]

Confused please explain?

lol, apparently i mis quoted him, the correct phrase was

They are sitting on a goldmine

which apparently means the 3rd f is worth a fortune if they would only market it right...

Apparently the going rate was a marrage certificate, but their giving it away for a few pints now.

What this has to do with fingers i'll never understand