Best wishes Joe - long may you keep us entertained with you incisive postings.

canny spelling there symptoms! oh lord or grammar and spelling i knew you would stumble sooner or later!

canny spelling there symptoms! oh lord or grammar and spelling i knew you would stumble sooner or later!

Ah, Monsta, Monsta, Monsta - you got me there! Hoisted by own petard - how embarrassing! However, before you disappear for a very short session of self-pleasuring by way of a celebration let me point-out that it was only ever my "aim" to provide good syntax, spelling, etc. An aim can only ever be an aspirational condition, never a pompous guarantee of perfection.

Mmmm, but how to expain the missing letter .... maybe the Dragon voice recognition software couldn't accurately deal with my regional accent. Perhaps it was a sticking letter r on my keyboard - no, it couldn't be that as I gave-up the joys of self-pleasuring years ago (you'll discover that when you get to my age). Could it be down to the Rousseau effect (the philosopher Monsta, not that big fat Greek singer*) who after being abused by country bumpkins, escaped, and only later realised his mistake in not dealing with the problem immediately; of course by then it was much too late to rectify the error? Might it have something to do with a brain addled by chemotherapy dope - nope!

Please Monsta (or should that be Monster) don't drag me off to the Camps ... forgive me.

*the fat Greek bloke is of course Demis Roussos - my poor attempt at injecting some humour into the proceedings.

Ah, Monsta, Monsta, Monsta - you got me there! Hoisted by own petard - how embarrassing! However, before you disappear for a very short session of self-pleasuring by way of a celebration let me point-out that it was only ever my "aim" to provide good syntax, spelling, etc. An aim can only ever be an aspirational condition, never a pompous guarantee of perfection.

Mmmm, but how to expain the missing letter .... maybe the Dragon voice recognition software couldn't accurately deal with my regional accent. Perhaps it was a sticking letter r on my keyboard - no, it couldn't be that as I gave-up the joys of self-pleasuring years ago (you'll discover that when you get to my age). Could it be down to the Rousseau effect (the philosopher Monsta, not that big fat Greek singer*) who after being abused by country bumpkins, escaped, and only later realised his mistake in not dealing with the problem immediately; of course by then it was much too late to rectify the error? Might it have something to do with a brain addled by chemotherapy dope - nope!

Please Monsta (or should that be Monster) don't drag me off to the Camps ... forgive me.

*the fat Greek bloke is of course Demis Roussos - my poor attempt at injecting some humour into the proceedings.

what ever you say and it's Mr Monsta to you! colonel we all know its you!

what ever you say and it's Mr Monsta to you! colonel we all know its you!

Hmmm... I think it could be time for the Colonel Test, Symptoms:

Claret or Alcopop?

Moon or Noir?

Belle or Sebastian?

Have you got my sledge?

You may all feel free to take this test... I will deduce my answers by your results.

Hmmm... I think it could be time for the Colonel Test, Symptoms:

Claret or Alcopop?

Moon or Noir?

Belle or Sebastian?

Have you got my sledge?

You may all feel free to take this test... I will deduce my answers by your results.

Well missvic, here goes ...

Moet surely

Great drummer riddled with demons

Belle AND Sebastian clearly

Not Percy?

or maybe I just don't understand the mechanics of the test.

Well missvic, here goes ...

Moet surely

Great drummer riddled with demons

Belle AND Sebastian clearly

Not Percy?

or maybe I just don't understand the mechanics of the test.

yes you really are stuck up your own !*!@# !

what ever you say and it's Mr Monsta to you! colonel we all know its you!

Could be, but I sense a denzelist lurking.

what ever you say and it's Mr Monsta to you! colonel we all know its you!

yes definitely colonel 100% pap

Flumbled

i was talking to your alter ego and that was a typo but im not the one claiming to be the oxford dictionary!

Could be, but I sense a denzelist lurking.

hope not