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Hubby and I went to town to visit a shop. When we came out there was a warden writing a parking ticket. We went up to him and I said “Come on, man. Give a senior citizen a break”. He ignored us completely and kept on writing. I called him an idiot. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for worn-out tyres, so my hubby called him a thickhead. He finished writing the ticket and put it on the windscreen together with the first and continued writing more tickets. This went on for another twenty minutes – us calling him names and him writing more tickets. Finally he finished, sneered at us and walked away. Just then our bus arrived so we got on it and went home. We always look for cars with ‘TRUMP 2016’ stickers because we try to have a little fun each day, now that we are retired. It’s so important at our age!

A five year old girl is usually driven to school every day by her granddad but when he had a bad cold she was driven by grandma instead. When she came home she told her parents that the ride to school was very different when granny was driving. “What made it so different?” her parents asked. “Grandma and I didn’t see a single t#sser, blind b@*tard, foreign pr!ck or w@#ker the whole of the journey”.

Simon Heffer in today's Telegraph speaks for me:

Number 13 - Ken MacDonald

No 20 is Jimmy Bradley and I think 15 is Derek Whales

Blimey Maggs ... they're mighty steep mountains in Jockoland but it's good to see those Cooper's coaches making light work of the climb.