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Brian ... Yep, I'm all for letting the convicts have their republic but please, please, please I crave one here! What a jape it would be if the German succession ended via an Argy missile and the House of Hewitt began with King Harry ... what a laugh.

Ok, Ok ... The poor mis-guided beige brigades of Middle England have continuously swallowed the guff perpetrated by that family of German con artists and their protectors. The sickening sight of the foolish masses with their easy-stretch trousers and cheap haircuts, wildly waving their banners and bunting, clutching their rolled-up copies of the hateful Daily Mail bowing and scraping to the wasters turns my stomach. What a complete waste of resources the lot of them are. I could go on for pages and pages but I think you get my drift. Do you want pages and pages more? Ah, to think back to all the good works done that glorious July night in Yekaterinburg.