keith lockey

Sorry Foxy, my hopes were dashed as well as soon as I saw it was about slugs and snails. But talking of nights out at the Toon. I remember when I was 17yr old going to Newcastle with a mate of mine and we went to a drinking establishment called the Bacchus. Now I remember very little of that night - except being turfed out of the pub for being underage. Which prompts me to ask does the Bacchus exist, or was it a figment of my alcholic condition. If it does exist where is it, and do you think they'll let me in without my birth certificate?

I caught a glimpse of this headline and immediately thought "Where Guy Fawkes failed..." http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/19422097

I know the feeling, Foxy, i was in the same bank last week and the girl behind the counter had a name tag on her left breast. It said Pat. So I did. My case comes up next week.

Is it me or does anyone else wonder at useless, unnecessary advertising. I bought a packet of frozen brussels sprouts at Tesco the other day and on the back it said - SUITABLE FOR VEGETARIANS.

Yes, I remember going upstairs and seeing all these nets and reels and other fishing regalia. As I said, i was into archery in those days but Bainbridges only sold the wooden arrows. I could get aluminium ones at a shop in Ashington - down by the old police station and the Portland. I'm sure it had a Scottish name - Mac' something. (Memory's gone.)

Thanks Foxy, you've shone through again. In the back of my mind I could see Bainbridges but I have so often been wrong. That's the shop alright.

There was a newsagents at Bedlington Station between Walter Wilsons and Keenlysides. They had a talking (Mynah) bird and I vaguely remember going upstairs where they sold sports equipment. (I was into archery then and I bought some arrows there.) Can anyone help me with this. Also - can anyone remember the white shop - Chisolms - on the corner! We used to by our Subbutteo teams and Action Man stuff there . Cheers.

Make sure you wash your sacrificed chicken down with loads of chocolatl. Thanks to the Aztecs (or maybe even the space gods) we got chocolate from them. Now as to Quetzalcoatl - I took my sorces from Michael Wood's Conquistadors and The Aztecs of Mexico by G. C. Vaillant; the former who I admire as a historian and explorer and the latter who goes into great detail about portents and omens seen by Montezuma prior to the Spanish arrival. But you are absolutely right about history being written by the winners. The Conquest of Central America is horrifically fascinating. What you got to understand as well is that the Europeans brought with them disease, firearms, cavalry and a whole new system of warfare - guarenteed to put the fear of God (Gods) into any religious person - and the Aztec pantheon is vast and baffling and they were VERY superstitious. On the whole I think Cortes 'invaded' at the right time and the right spot - depending on who's view you take. PS, If you get the chance read the Lost City of the Incas - Hiram Bingham, the guy who discovered Machu Picchu. Now where's my crystal skull? I want to put my lottery on.

Stephen Johnston!!!! Johnta - A magician on a cruise ship!!!! Well I'll be! I never knew that Keith. I remember he was a good footballer. I'm trying to remember our football team. Jimmy Mitchell in nets. The defence was Stew Dobson, Colin Crocker, Dennis Tydeman, then there was Dennis Cunningham, Johnta, Neil watson and myself on the left wing. But who the other three were is lost to the memory.

They have arrived! http://uk.news.yahoo.com/heavens-above-midlanders-behold-stunning-angel-cloud.html;_ylt=At5u0rx.24cJW2s4hxaW6bvAfMl_;_ylu=X3oDMTFwZDR1ZGhiBG1pdANvbmx5IG9uIHlhaG9vIDE1MDMyMDEyBHBvcwMyBHNlYwNNZWRpYUVkaXRvclBpY2tzVGVtcA--;_ylg=X3oDMTJqZDhtN3ZxBGludGwDZ2IEbGFuZwNlbi1nYgRwc3RhaWQDMDkyMWFkM2EtODgwNC0zNWY5LWE3ZDgtNWQwZGIzNWM4ZTI2BHBzdGNhdAMEcHQDc3RvcnlwYWdl;_ylv=3

Think of this as well - just under 500 years ago, Copernicus published his De Revolutionibus Orbium Coelestium in 1543, stating that the sun was at the centre of our universe - not the Earth - as everyone in the church was thinking at the time. But Copernicus had held back the book for decades for fear of the church. (Bruno got burned at the stake for similar 'preachings'.) Science and the church have been at loggerheads for hundreds of years - maybe thousands if we go back to Egyptian astronomers and the Sumerians. People supressed the truth because it would go against the norm. Also consider this. Orson Welles broadcast the War of the Worlds in 1938 and caused widespread panic. Can you imagine any world leader standing in front of a camera and telling the populace that the world is about to end - or be changed forever!!! We, the teeming masses, the hoi polloi, would be the last to know. they would probably announce it after the cricket results. "England had a good day at Lords at the start of the Ashes...and talking of which the planet is about to be destroyed in a fireball by the planet Nibiru."

ANTARCTICA LATEST http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/antarctica/9069588/Lake-Vostok-Russia-scientists-reach-underground-Antarctic-lake.html#

What's a wind farm - a field full of Brussel sprouts!

Gadzooks sirrah! You put in doubt my scientific renderings? You question my cornucopic data bank of cosmic cognizance and astronomic assertations? I consulted the oracles to bring you these fore-warnings; i cast the runes, shook the bones and even read the tea-leaves. My findings were based on the best scientific minds available - ie wikipedia and Mystic Meg. I went to Stonehenge and danced naked amongst the monoliths in search of wisdom for this site. In my Dervish state I was contacted by a triple-eyed Venusian called Vera who told me emphatically that NASA are part of the 2012 conspiracy theory and that the reptoids of circling Nibiru are preparing their motherships for the main attack on the 21st of december when the Earth passes over the cosmic plane and enters the fifth dimension. She assured me that all the major cities would be targeted first - New York, Moscow, Bedlington. But fear not, for if they land here we'll give them a good yarking, a damned good howking. Geordie belligerence and its best. As to polar shifts thoust should look at the findings in Antarctica. (I will consult the ancient ones of Atlantis for more data on this subject - watch this space. no pun intended!) As for the Mayans they did indeed have innovative astronomical knowledge as well as mathematical wisdom and perchance you are right when you say things have been taken out of context - but then again they may have known things that have been lost in translation. But harken to this slice of history from the Central American civilizations - The Aztec prophecies said the pale-faced god Quetzalcoatl would return from the east to take his rightful place and that he would return in the year 1-Reed. That year in western timescale was 1519 - the year Hernan Cortes arrived at Vera Cruz - from the east - and destroyed the Aztec nation with 500 conquistadors. COINCIDENCE! or prophetic warning. So sleep easy, my friends, until the 21st of december when the motherships will arrive and....what's that nurse? Time for my medication?

I'll try that one again. Don't know what happened there. Please just watch the first minute and twenty seconds. The rest is naff. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfRJ34cTMRs&feature=related

PLEASE JUST WATCH THE FIRST MINUTE AND TWENTY SECONDS - THE REST IS....WELL JUST DON'T BOTHER!

Mine has words in like Gadzooks and begat in - so it can't be that old!!! I mean Queen Victoria is on the cover. No, I actually looked it up in the Oxford Reference Dictionary 1986. When I checked again it had both versions in. And the lesson to remember is to put my glasses on when looking things up.

Yeah, the 21st december. The real puzzler is how the Mayans knew about this alignment. It's supposed to happen every 26,000 years or something. (I really should know more about this but there are that many theories it's hard to keep up.) I think it is like a rollercoaster ride - the sun is crossing over the equator and will be in a new plane. To be honest Malcolm it's quite scary. Planet Earth has seen many changes throughout its birth, there is evidence of polar reversals - something to do with magnetic field changes if I'm correct. And it could happen again. North and South becomes East and West, that sort of thing. It will be interesting to see what happens. So I'm going to hedge my bets on this one. The truth is out there but we might not find out what it is until it is too late. Look on the bright side, though, this time next year Bedlington could be on the equator.

I can actually remember the 'school-board man' coming to our house after I went down with a poisoned heel. I lost a lot of skooling but it didn't affect my edukayshun. The head-teacher, Mr Surtees, eventually picked me up every day and took me to Colditz...er...school. (PS, My granny used to put bread poltices on my heel!!!!)

OOH Matron!, Stop messing about. Listen what I do with my fifteen-inch refractor in my own garden is nobody's business. HA Ha - I didn't mean any double entendre with cul-de-sac. Honest! But you do have to be careful when you're looking at heavenly bodies with your bins - stop it, you know what I mean. One night there was a beautiful crescent moon with Venus within its horns (I'm off again) but just below this cosmic configuration - in hand measurement ratio - was someones bedroom. The common sense angel floated down onto my shoulder and I put my binoculars away and went inside. I bet Sir Patrick Moore doesn't have this problem. If it's not light pollution that stops me it's decency. Darn and blast! Houston, we have a problem.

Not quite sure how to take that.

Yes, much to my chagrin I see it can be spelt either way. (I had checked my OED first and they just spell it with an e.) It makes me wonder why i bothered going to skool!!!

I learned a valuable lesson regarding garden astronomy. If you stand in your back yard with a telescope people see you and say "Look, Keith must have become an astronomer". But if you stand in the garden with a pair of binoculars looking at the moon just above rooftop level then the terms "pervert" & "Peeping Tom" become applicable! "Honest your honour, I was looking for Uranus." Luckily enough I have understanding neighbours in my cul-de-sac.

DREDD 3D The new Judge Dredd movie is heading our way. Outstanding special effects, lavish sets, cast of hundreds, a budget 0f $45million. Its a pity they hadn't spent a few dollars on a spell checker. Look at the promo poster. Shouldn't there be an e in there?

To me the moon missions rank with the 16th century voyages of discovery. Only the astronauts sailed on the sea of space and truly went where no man had gone before. It must have taken real guts to blast off on the back of a Saturn rocket and leave the Earth's atmosphere and you can only stand in awe of the twelve men who actually set foot on the moon and watched an Earthrise. But on a personal level for me it was a time of innocence or at least the end of innocence. I was 12 years old when they landed on the moon. I was afraid of nothing in those days; life was still a great adventure and the sky was blue and the grass was green. I started listening to music - The Moody Blues, Bread, David Bowie and a host of others. The world was alive then, but looking back I guess I was just seeing things through rose-tinted glasses. The world wasn't perfect, not then and certainly not now; it never will be. But we can never imagine what it is like to stand on the moon and look down on the Earth. Petty squabbles and personal problems must fade into insignificance from up there. It's a pity all the politicians and leaders of the world cannot be transported to the moon and gaze down upon this blue world. Maybe if they did the world would be a better place. But I seriously doubt it! I often get the binoculars out and look up at the moon's surface. It's like Buzz Aldrin said - Magnificent desolation.