Cympil Posted August 14, 2007 Report Share Posted August 14, 2007 Take off clothes and place them sectioned in the laundry basket according to lights and darks.Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts etc.Get in the shower.Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.Wash your hair again to make sure it is clean.Condition your hair with conditioner enhanced with grapefruit and mint.Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.Rinse conditioner off hair.Shave armpits and legs.Turn off shower.Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.Spray mould spots with tile cleaner.Get out of shower.Dry with towel the size of a small country.Wrap hair in a super absorbent towel.Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and the hand towel on head.If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MONGO Posted August 14, 2007 Report Share Posted August 14, 2007 shower like a manTake off clothes and place them on the floorWalk to bathroom wearing ya boxersIf you see wife along the way, scratch ya balls whilst fartingLook at your manly physique in the mirror whilst rotating ya winky like a helicoptertake off boxersGet in the shower.Use sponge, Wash your hair once with shampooWash your face with soap or lynx shower gelWash entire rest of body with soap or lynx shower gelwash armpits !*!@# balls and winkyTurn off shower.Get out of shower.Dry with ya towel Return to bedroom wearing ya boxersIf you see your wife along the way, drop ya kegs and give her one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blank Posted August 14, 2007 Report Share Posted August 14, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 14, 2007 Report Share Posted August 14, 2007 shower like a manTake off clothes and place them on the floorWalk to bathroom wearing ya boxersIf you see wife along the way, scratch ya balls whilst fartingLook at your manly physique in the mirror whilst rotating ya winky like a helicoptertake off boxersGet in the shower.Use sponge, Wash your hair once with shampooWash your face with soap or lynx shower gelWash entire rest of body with soap or lynx shower gelwash armpits !*!@# balls and winkyTurn off shower.Get out of shower.Dry with ya towel Return to bedroom wearing ya boxersIf you see your wife along the way, drop ya kegs and give her one There is an easier way than that, I walk to the canal jump in, splash about and lie on the bank until the sun dries me and my clothes. This saves on electricity running the shower and you wash your clothes at the same time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blank Posted August 14, 2007 Report Share Posted August 14, 2007 There is an easier way than that, I walk to the canal jump in, splash about and lie on the bank until the sun dries me and my clothes. This saves on electricity running the shower and you wash your clothes at the same time. Hahahaha, thats one way to have a wash! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 16, 2007 Report Share Posted August 16, 2007 Hahahaha, thats one way to have a wash!Its the only way Blank, its totally refreshing in the middle of winter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PussyKat Posted August 17, 2007 Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 we aint all like that you no!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PussyKat Posted August 17, 2007 Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 rotfpmsl - keep em comin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cympil Posted August 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 we aint all like that you no!!are you one of these lasses that just wash your 3 "f"s before you gan oot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 17, 2007 Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 are you one of these lasses that just wash your 3 "f"s before you gan oot 3 'F's? i got 2 of em.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cympil Posted August 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 3 'F's? i got 2 of em....What two have you got? Face and feet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 17, 2007 Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 What two have you got? Face and feet?LMAO! no, i missed feet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cympil Posted August 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 LMAO! no, i missed feet!So what was the two you got then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 17, 2007 Report Share Posted August 17, 2007 So what was the two you got then? Face and F.......ingers??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cympil Posted August 18, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 18, 2007 Face and F.......ingers??? Aye Wey no,actually it rhymes with nanny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 18, 2007 Report Share Posted August 18, 2007 Aye Wey no,actually it rhymes with nanny It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlin Posted August 19, 2007 Report Share Posted August 19, 2007 It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun....no thats a mazer........................it would be a mazer if it wasn't there :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 19, 2007 Report Share Posted August 19, 2007 no thats a mazer........................it would be a mazer if it wasn't there My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....Dunno what he ment tho.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsta® Posted August 19, 2007 Report Share Posted August 19, 2007 My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....Dunno what he ment tho.. so a tek it you never found the end of the rainbow? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 20, 2007 Report Share Posted August 20, 2007 It wouldnt be near a planets namesake would it? you know, the seventh one from the sun....Pluto? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 20, 2007 Report Share Posted August 20, 2007 My dad used to say it was a pot of gold....Dunno what he ment tho.. Confused please explain? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Darn Posted August 20, 2007 Report Share Posted August 20, 2007 Confused please explain? lol, apparently i mis quoted him, the correct phrase was They are sitting on a goldminewhich apparently means the 3rd f is worth a fortune if they would only market it right...Apparently the going rate was a marrage certificate, but their giving it away for a few pints now.What this has to do with fingers i'll never understand Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create a free account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now