Is It Me?

[Brett]

^{I've just received the NORTHUMBERLAND Adult Learning prospectus this week. Now is it me, or does everyone on the cover look American!!!}

^{I'm sorry, but it just looks as if its a brochure for Mitt Romney's ideal of the future or Bible belt USA. (Stock photo?)}

Quite clearly the very bottom right is british as she has 3 kids from different fathers judging from the picture.

[Malcolm Robinson]

Quite clearly the very bottom right is british as she has 3 kids from different fathers judging from the picture.

And everyone says I say the wrong things!!!!!!!!

[keith lockey]

http://www.bbc.co.uk...health-19436926

They should have asked my dad (Behind Bar) and his mates first.

(PS The one on the right is Dusty Thornton but I don't know who the other is. Can anyone help?)

[keith lockey]

So now they are saying pain killers make you worse! So does that mean I can get a refund off the multi-million-pound drugs firms who have been selling these products under false pretenses?

[keith lockey]

http://uk.news.yahoo...-001751492.html

Man dies after eating live bugs!!! No sh***t Sherlock!

I mean come on now; you cannot be serious about what the cause of death might be.

Only in America!!!

Edited October 9, 2012 by keith lockey

[keith lockey]

_{http://blogs.telegra...op-earthquakes/}

_{So Italy has just locked up a group of scientist because of an earthquake prediction that was ambiguous.}

_{Do earthquakes not come under 'an act of God?'}

_{As Tom Chivers says - such an action by the Italian government will frighten scientists off from making any prediction.}

_{Mad World.}

Edited October 24, 2012 by keith lockey

[Malcolm Robinson]

With reference to this topic's title................almost certainly!

[keith lockey]

As some of you know I am in the process of having my cooncil hoose 'done out'. New kitchens, bathrooms, radiators, windows and uncle Tom Tobly and all. Now the work started on this in the spring in various streets and estates. They started my house in October. We were told we would get vouchers to help with the decorating...great, smashing, super, said all - UNTIL - some people started selling the vouchers for money - so now we have been told we can only spend these vouchers at ONE paint shop - and that is in Newcastle. So once again the majority is being penalized by the actions of the minority. But is it me who is the only one smelling fish in this 'deal'?

[John Fox (foxy)]

Funnier things have happened on the Golf Course. :devil:

Edited October 28, 2012 by foxy

[mercuryg]

Reading through this thread has kept me amused: the advertising comments reminded me of a kitchen implement I once saw, an electric carving knife, which carried the warning on the back : "NOT SUITABLE FOR THE OTHER USE".

[Symptoms]

Shock, horror, scandal ... you mean that there are still Council houses around? I though GGG's lot had sold them all off back in the day! I demand answers as to why the vile ruling elite - those scum-sucking Tories never finished the job off. Further, I want to know how on earth they didn't close the loophole of paying for the tenants' re-decorations ... typical Tory corruption; we'll probably discover the boss of the voucher company is the wife of some serving Cabinet Minister.

[keith lockey]

Shock, horror, scandal ... you mean that there are still Council houses around? I though GGG's lot had sold them all off back in the day! I demand answers as to why the vile ruling elite - those scum-sucking Tories never finished the job off. Further, I want to know how on earth they didn't close the loophole of paying for the tenants' re-decorations ... typical Tory corruption; we'll probably discover the boss of the voucher company is the wife of some serving Cabinet Minister.

As Del boy would say Symptoms, a nice little earner - you can have decorating vouchers but you can only spend them at one shop - owned by my Uncle 'Honest' John. Know what I mean, nudge nudge wink wink . That's the way it seems, anyway.

Edited October 29, 2012 by keith lockey

[Malcolm Robinson]

Shock, horror, scandal ... you mean that there are still Council houses around? I though GGG's lot had sold them all off back in the day! I demand answers as to why the vile ruling elite - those scum-sucking Tories never finished the job off. Further, I want to know how on earth they didn't close the loophole of paying for the tenants' re-decorations ... typical Tory corruption; we'll probably discover the boss of the voucher company is the wife of some serving Cabinet Minister.

Sym,

It might have been GGG's lot that put them up for sale but it was your supposed hard pressed downtrodden third estate who bought them!

When everyone lives in a greenhouses watch out for stones......

As for any hint of venality in having to use one single supplier to get supplies from, that would presuppose an electrical current across a bit of grey matter........ I don't think anyone would have seen the economic sense that made and picking one in Newcastle would seem to exemplify that point entirely!

[keith lockey]

The problem with the shop in Newcastle is that not everyone has a car to ferry said paints and wallpaper to and from the Toon to, say, Bedlington. Now use some more electric current across the grey matter - I want ten rolls of wallpaper and five tins of emulsion-cum-gloss to decorate my humble abode. How am I going to carry all that from the Toon to Bedlington. (Bearing in mind bus drivers can stop you carrying paint on public transport). Also bear in mind we aren't even allowed to spend the vouchers at Tallantyres - a local community shop - and look how many local community shops are sinking because of lack of trade. Use the math - Bedlington people need paint and wallpaper - Tallantyres is an ideal shop - but said peopl aren't allowed to trade there. (It just don't make sense, partner.) We have Wilkinsons in Blyth and Asherton - more local stores, but we cannot buy goods there either. Sorry, Malcolm, but there is something wrong with the thinking on this one, it was a bad call on the planners part. Common sense took a bullet here.

Edited October 30, 2012 by keith lockey

[Malcolm Robinson]

I did think about putting this in the joke section but on reflection its soootru!

EATING IN THE UK IN THE FIFTIES

* Pasta had not been invented.

* Curry was an unknown entity.

* Olive oil was kept in the medicine cabinet

* Spices came from the Middle East where we believed that they were used for embalming

* Herbs were used to make rather dodgy medicine.

* A takeaway was a mathematical problem.

* A pizza was something to do with a leaning tower.

* Bananas and oranges only appeared at Christmas time.

* The only vegetables known to us were spuds, peas, carrots and cabbage,

anything else was regarded as being a bit suspicious.

* All crisps were plain; the only choice we had was whether to put the salt on or not.

* Condiments consisted of salt, pepper, vinegar and brown sauce if we were lucky.

* Soft drinks were called pop.

* Coke was something that we mixed with coal to make it last longer.

* A Chinese chippy was a foreign carpenter.

* Rice was a milk pudding, and never, ever part of our dinner.

* A Big Mac was what we wore when it was raining.

* A Pizza Hut was an Italian shed.

* A microwave was something out of a science fiction movie.

* Brown bread was something only poor people ate.

* Oil was for lubricating your bike not for cooking, fat was for cooking

* Bread and jam was a treat.

* Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves, not bags.

* The tea cosy was the forerunner of all the energy saving devices that we hear so much about today.

* Tea had only one colour, black. Green tea was not British.

* Coffee was only drunk when we had no tea….. and then it was Camp, and came in a bottle.

* Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.

* Figs and dates appeared every Christmas, but no one ever ate them.

* Sweets and confectionery were called toffees.

* Coconuts only appeared when the fair came to town.

* Black puddings were mined in Bolton Lancashire.

* Jellied eels were peculiar to Londoners.

* Salad cream was a dressing for salads, mayonnaise did not exist

* Hors d'oeuvre was a spelling mistake.

* The starter was our main meal.

* Soup was a main meal.

* The menu consisted of what we were given, and was set in stone.

* Only Heinz made beans, any others were impostors.

* Leftovers went in the dog.

* Special food for dogs and cats was unheard of.

* Sauce was either brown or red.

* Fish was only eaten on Fridays.

* Fish didn't have fingers in those days.

* Eating raw fish was called poverty, not sushi.

* Ready meals only came from the fish and chip shop.

* For the best taste fish and chips had to be eaten out of old newspapers.

* Frozen food was called ice cream.

* Nothing ever went off in the fridge because we never had one.

* Ice cream only came in one colour and one flavour.

* None of us had ever heard of yoghurt.

* Jelly and blancmange was only eaten at parties.

* If we said that we were on a diet, we simply got less.

* Healthy food consisted of anything edible.

* Healthy food had to have the ability to stick to your ribs.

* Calories were mentioned but they had nothing at all to do with food.

* The only criteria concerning the food that we ate were ... did we like it and could we afford it.

* People who didn't peel potatoes were regarded as lazy so and so's.

* Indian restaurants were only found in India .

* A seven course meal had to last a week.

* Brunch was not a meal.

* Cheese only came in a hard lump.

* If we had eaten bacon lettuce and tomato in the same sandwich we would have been

certified

* A bun was a small cake back then.

* A tart was a fruit filled pastry, not a lady of horizontal pleasure.

* The word" Barbie" was not associated with anything to do with food.

* Eating outside was called a picnic.

* Cooking outside was called camping.

* Seaweed was not a recognised food.

* Offal was only eaten when we could afford it.

* Eggs only came fried or boiled.

* Hot cross buns were only eaten at Easter time.

* Pancakes were only eaten on Pancake Tuesday - in fact in those days it was compulsory.

* "Kebab" was not even a word never mind a food.

* Hot dogs were a type of sausage that only the Americans ate.

* Cornflakes had arrived from America but it was obvious that they would never catch on.

* The phrase "boil in the bag" would have been beyond our realms of comprehension.

* The idea of "oven chips" would not have made any sense at all to us.

* The world had not yet benefited from weird and wonderful things

like Pot Noodles, Instant Mash and Pop Tarts.

* We bought milk and cream at the same time in the same bottle.

* Sugar enjoyed a good press in those days, and was regarded as being white gold.

* Lettuce and tomatoes in winter were just a rumour.

* Most soft fruits were seasonal except perhaps at Christmas.

* Prunes were medicinal.

* Surprisingly muesli was readily available in those days, it was called cattle feed.

* Turkeys were definitely seasonal.

* Pineapples came in chunks in a tin; we had only ever seen a picture of a real one.

* We didn't eat Croissants in those days because we couldn't pronounce them,

we couldn't spell them and we didn't know what they were.

* We thought that Baguettes were a serious problem the French needed to deal with.

* Garlic was used to ward off vampires, but never used to flavour bread.

* Water came out of the tap, if someone had suggested bottling it and charging treble for it

they would have become a laughing stock.

* Food hygiene was all about washing your hands before meals.

* Campylobacter, Salmonella, E.coli, Listeria, and Botulism were all called "food poisoning."

* The one thing that we never ever had on our table in the fifties …. elbows.

[Malcolm Robinson]

Keith,

I am actually agreeing with you!

I think stuff like this is a very real missed opportunity to help our beleaguered local shops. I just don't think anyone in the system would have thought about it!

[keith lockey]

Keith,

I am actually agreeing with you!

I think stuff like this is a very real missed opportunity to help our beleaguered local shops. I just don't think anyone in the system would have thought about it!

Yeah, sorry, Malcolm, it's just very frustrating. I heard that it was a decsion made by the Peoples Committe (?), whoever they are. But why not tell everyone just to keep their receipts as proof of purchase then hand them in to the distributors!! That way we are not restricted to one store in Newcastle. It's banging your head against a brick wall time.

[Malcolm Robinson]

Do you want me to throw this at them and try to get it changed?

[keith lockey]

Do you want me to throw this at them and try to get it changed?

Throw it at them!! You have my permission to pour it forth from the heavens; unleash the Kraken, man, thunderbolts and lightning, conjure up the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, blow Gabriel's horn and bring down the walls of Jericho. Let me know when I'm overdoing it, won't you!!!

It's a bit late for me now anyway, Maria is going to take me through, HOPEFULLY. but it's a hard way of doing something easy, that's the way I see it. The annoying thing is that there is better stuff at Wilkinson's and other shops!

Edited October 30, 2012 by keith lockey

[Adam Hogg]

Is it me or would anyone class these two videos as left wing? Just wondering because of being called a left winger and this is my favourite film.

Please be warned this video does contain one bad swear word: so that will be a fiver in the swear box from me.

[Adam Hogg]

BECAUSE BETTY SAXE-COBURG & GOTHA WINDSOR HAS TWO BIRTHDAYS AS SHE IS MY ANOINTED ONE AMONST YOU

Is it me or does this comment by GOD sound familiar? (Symptoms)

[Canny lass]

No, it's not just you Adam. I thought the same thing.

[keith lockey]

I don't think they are left wing, Adam. They are more observations on the Tory Government but I don't think that necessarily makes them left wing as such, as contradictory as that sounds. The first one, naturally, alludes to the pit closures but the second one is more a diatribe against God - using the Tories as the scapegoat again. Don't for one moment think I am defending the Tories - no way - but what we have in party politics now is a parallel universe of ideas. You can't actually tell the difference - or rather you couldn't - between the Tories and Labour. It's that old adage - what they say to get into power and what they do when they are in is two different things. Kiss the baby then steal its candy. I thought the clips were just two great examples of the little man standing up against the big system - but both knowing they can't win. The Tories got a slating in both cases but it could just as well apply to Labour as well I suppose. (Except they haven't got a party anymore thanks to Gordo.)

Edited December 20, 2012 by keith lockey

[keith lockey]

Is it me or is this a sorry state of affairs; I mean have we really come to this?

http://uk.news.yahoo...67.html#6cvS5De

Edited December 21, 2012 by keith lockey

[Adam Hogg]

Is it me or is this a sorry state of affairs; I mean have we really come to this?

http://uk.news.yahoo...67.html#6cvS5De

It will not end there Keith. The Americans have in their constitution "the right to bear arms," however as the American show Family Guy states does that mean you have the right to have bear arms, or is it the right to bear firearms?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RablPaIREkk