When I take a long time I'm slow When my boss takes a long time he's thorough When I don't do it I'm lazy When my boss doesn't do it he's busy When I make a mistake, I'm an idiot When my boss makes a mistake, he's only human. When I do something without being told, I'm overstepping my authority When my boss does the same, that's initiative When I take a stand, I'm being bull-headed When my boss does it, he's being firm. When I overlooked a rule of etiquette, I'm being rude When my boss skips a few rules, he's being original When I'm out of the office, I'm wandering around When my boss is out of the office, he's on business When I'm on a day off sick, I'm always sick When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill When I apply for leave, I must be going for an interview When my boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked When I please my boss I'm crawling When my boss pleases his boss, he's co-operating When I do good, my boss never remembers When I do wrong, my boss never forgets......