Brian Cross

I have got my mate who is an expert on ancient languages to work on it, shouldn't take more than a few weeks ..... :wtf:Not sure of who it is myself.

An 8-year-old girl went to her grandfather, who was working in the yard and asked him, "Grampa, what is couple sex?" The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she's old enough to know to ask the question, then she's old enough to get a straight answer. Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and the joys and responsibilities of intercourse. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement. Seeing the look on her face, the grandfather asked her, "Why did you ask this question, honey?" The little girl replied, "Grandma says that dinner will be ready in just a couple sex

Sounds good Colin wish i was there for the event.

Brilliant Malcolm i watched it twice

"The budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed, lest Rome become bankrupt. People must again learn to work instead of living on public assistance." - Cicero , 55 BC

yes the station next eh Keith ?

Make mine a Carling Mal...........

Could get interesting this one ..........

For me Gob Shut !!

Happy birthday Foxy have a good one

Does anyone use the chat room i often open it up but i have never found anyone in there ?

Ah Keith what you have to do for fashion eh !!

I don't know if this counts as i did not actually meet these folks.......A long time ago i was riding my Harley in Canberra in the ACT as i turned onto the main road i spotted a motorcade up ahead so being a nosey geordie lad i sped up until i was alongside the main limo and and when i looked in to see who was there behold it was the Queen and Phil and they were not impressed and neither were the Federal police who guided me onto a side road to question me in depth..........there thats it

Thanks for the pics Malcolm and Adam

Two Irishmen were waiting at the bus stop when a truck went past loaded up with rolls of turf. Jimmy said, "I'm gonna do dat when I win da lottery.†"What's dat den?†asks Mikey. "Send me lawn away to be mowed."

Love it boyo

Not this Brian let me assure you all !!

Well done Keith keep it going mate ............

I remember the Lynns butcher shop in the oval well, is the original Don still with us

To say nowt about there lovely pork pies................

Soory Ladies A woman goes to the Doctor in Glasgae, worried about her husband's temper and threatening manner. The Doc asks: "What's the problem, Janet? The woman says: "Weeell Doctor Cameron, I dinae know what to do. Every time ma hubbie comes home drunk, he threatens to slap me aroon'." The Doctor says: "Aye, well... I have a real good cure for that. When your husband arrives home intoxicated, just take a wee glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he goes to bed and is sound asleep." Two weeks later she comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn. She says: "Doctor that was brilliant! Evrae time ma hubbie came home drunk, I swished with water. I swished an' swished, and he didnae touch me even once! Tell me Doc...wha's the secret? How's the water do that?" The Doctor says: "Janet hen, it's really nae big secret. The water does !*!@# all - it's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick..."

Good one Mal

19 Icould lose 19 yrs and still be an old codger Happy Birthday Adam.................

TIMBUKTU - A RIPPER The Australian Poetry Competition had come down to two finalists; a university graduate and an old aboriginal. They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was 'TIMBUKTU' First to recite his poem was the university graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said: "Slowly across the desert sand, Trekked a lonely caravan Men on camels two by two Destination - Timbuktu." The crowd went crazy! No way could the old aboriginal top that, they thought. The old aboriginal calmly made his way to the microphone and recited: "Me and Tim a huntin' went, Met three whores in a pop up tent, They were three, and we was two So I bucked one, and tim buktu." The aboriginal won.

The Goldberg Brothers - The Inventors of the Automobile Air Conditioner Here's a little fact for automotive buffs or just to dazzle your friends. The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Max, invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner. On July 17, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees. The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen were there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry since the electric starter. Henry was curious and invited them into his office. They refused and instead asked that he come out to the parking lot to their car. They persuaded him to get into the car, which was about 130 degrees, turned on the air conditioner, and cooled the car off immediately. The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office, where he offered them $3 million for the patent. The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but they wanted the recognition by having a label, 'The Goldberg Air-Conditioner,' on the dashboard of each car in which it was installed. Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti-Semitic, and there was no way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two million Fords. They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed on $4 million and that just their first names would be shown. And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show -- Lo, Norm, Hi, and Max -- on the controls. Control yourself !!!