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John Fox (foxy)

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Posts posted by John Fox (foxy)

  2. Quiz Connections

    in Entertainment

    Posted

    Thanks Keith, can't wait to get started, when will the masking tap arrive, before Thursday I hope as I have a ticket for the match on Thursday night (Toon v Benfica)

    If the tape arrives early enough Pete, put it over your eyes :(

  3. Tescos Again

    in Talk of the Town

    Posted

    I really am very suprised that not more local folk are kicking up about the state of our town - you can only turn a blind eye for so long!

    Hopefully we should'nt have to wait much longer tomtom, the elections aren't far away and I'm sure we'll be getting rid of the Dead Wood :)

    • Like 1

  5. Good Jokes: Not For The Faint-Hearted (Adult content)

    in Chat Central

    Posted

    A man went into an urologist and told him he was having a problem, as

    he was unable to get his "old chap standing to attention".

    The doctor checked him out then told him that the muscles around the

    base of the organ were damaged from a previous viral infection and

    there was nothing he could actually do for him.

    However, he knew of an experimental treatment that might work, if he was willing to take the risk.

    The treatment consisted of planting muscle tissues from an elephant's

    trunk into his 'old fella'.

    The man thought about it for a while. The thought of having to go

    through life without sex was too much for him to bear.

    So, with the assurance that there would be no cruelty to the elephant,

    the man decided to go for it.

    A few weeks after the operation, he was given the green light to go and try out his newly renovated equipment.

    As a result he planned a romantic evening with his girl friend and took

    her to one of the nicest restaurants in town. In the middle of dinner

    he felt a strong stirring in his loins that continued to the point of

    being extremely painful. To release the pressure he unzipped his fly

    and his "old chap" sprang out, slid across the top of the table, grabbed a bread roll and returned to his trousers.

    His girlfriend was stunned at first, but then with a sly grin on her

    face said, 'That was incredible! Can you do that again?'

    With tears in his eyes he replied, 'I think I can, but I am not sure if

    another bread roll will fit up my backside!'.

  8. Guess Where

    in History Hollow

    Posted · Edited by foxy

    I went online to have a look at it. (See link) and it looks kinda posh. They say they do meals during the day. But what's the clientele like? Is it Red Lion or Clayton Arms? (Can't imagine the latter.) I mean I don't want to take her to a hub of white slavers...then again!

    Keith,

    when I said the scenery was quite tasty I wasn't talking about the decor,It was that other thing that attracts Fella's into the place (no not the beer either) :Mind you,I can only look :o

  9. Guess Where

    in History Hollow

    Posted

    Me and Maria fancy a goosey goosey in there, Foxy. What's the meals like, do you know?

    The only time I'm in there Keith is a Friday night and I can't say I've ever seen anyone eating. Its always so busy no one would be able to enjoy a meal anyway. Im not sure if they do food when its quieter.

  10. Guess Where

    in History Hollow

    Posted

    I'll dig out my kipper tie and iron my flares. A ten bob note should cover the drinks, shouldn't it. (That was the last time I had a night out in the toon. The Bacchus was the pub.)

    I'll be in the Bacchus tonight Keith,

    your ten bob won't go far though, the round is four pints of Lager and it comes to just under fourteen quid. Mind you the scenery's quite tasty :dribble: :dribble: :dribble: :dribble:

  11. Guess Where

    in History Hollow

    Posted

    Aye you got it Keith,

    looks like I need to give in with these cos the last two have been cracked on day one.The prize was'nt that good anyway, its a night out with Dame Edna Everage. You may as well come to the Toon with me tonight!

  17. Dialect Words And More

    in Chat Central

    Posted

    THE TRUTH ABOOT THE WAALL

    It was built for the Romans, way back in the past;

    They built it with stone, and they built it to last.

    Quite a change for the locals from digging for coal

    And it kept a large number of men off the dole.

    It was the Emperor Hadrian who started it all

    When he ordered the peasants to build him this waall.

    Just what it was for there was neebody sure

    And the reasons he gave were a little obscure.

    "This waall," said the Emperor, rubbing his chin,

    "Is to stop aall the Picts and the Scots getting in;

    Aa'm used to the Geordies, Aa knaa aall their tricks,

    But Aa just cannit stomach the Scots and the Picts".

    They started the Waall on the banks of the Tyne

    And they tried very hard for to keep a strite line.

    There were thoosands of Geordies with shovels and picks

    And the rate for the job was eleven and six.

    The stones for the Waall came by bogie and barrow;

    They were cut from the quarries at Hebburn and Jarrow.

    They floated them over the Tyne on a raft,

    (Them owld fashioned Geordies could certainly graft).

    They travelled to Byker with nivver a spell

    But they stopped for a pint when they reached the "Bluebell".

    Then on across meadow and valley and dyke

    With nivvor a murmur of trouble or stike.

    Onwards they went, heading West all the time,

    Still trying their best for to keep a strite line.

    In summer they struggled through bracken and heather

    And they plodged in the clarts during inclement weather.

    They laid the last stone on the second of June

    and Hadrian said, "Lads, Aa'm ower the moon,

    Aa would like you to knaa that Aa'm proud of you aall,

    And Aa thank you aall kindly for building me waall".

    A big celebration was held at Carlisle;

    They had a grand neet and they done it in style.

    The picks and the shovels were aall put away

    And the workers were given an extra week's pay.

    The Picts and the Scots were a little bit vexed

    And voices were raised and muscles were flexed.

    But their yelling and shootin' did nee good at aall;

    It takes more than taalkin' to get past a waail.

    And that is the story, believe it or not,

    Of how they defeated the Pict and the Scot;

    How the Waall was constructed for one man's enjoyment

    And the North-East was rescued from mass unemployment.

    .

  18. Guess Where

    in History Hollow

    Posted

    Sorry Maggie

    I've just got home from the pub after drowning my sorrows because you and Pete found the answer too easy. I'll be back with something more difficult soon. Can you put a date on this? Think Inspector Threegee will get this one.

  19. Clay Pipes

    in Talk of the Town

    Posted · Edited by foxy

    There was a barbershop just here through the gate and on the left called "Billy the Barbers" funily enough.It was run by brothers, My mother would take me here to have my "Heed taken down to the Wood" some of the members on here may know a bit more about them (Threegee)

    Hold on, that could be me going in there :|

  22. Elliotts Garage

    in Chat Central

    Posted · Edited by foxy

    Contact the HSE if you think it is a risk to Health and Safety they should deal with that, same if you think anything is against Building Regulations contact NCC Building Control.

    And they'll probably tell you "its got nowt to do with us" and I'm speaking from experience, waste of time the whole lot of them

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