Malcolm Robinson

Made glorious summer, by this side of pork.........

An Italian husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open-mouthed kiss, says she'll see him later and walks away. The wife glares at her husband and says, "Who was that?" "Oh," replies the husband, "she's my mistress." "Well, that's the last straw," says the wife. "I've had enough, I want a divorce!" "I can understand that," replies her husband, "but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Jaguar in the garage and no more yacht club. No more credit card and large Bank accounts. But....The decision is all yours." Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm. "Who's that woman with Tony?" asks the wife. "That's his mistress," says her husband. "Ours is prettier," she replies.

You haven't met Wor Lass then Brett............

Now this really is the sort of thing Americans should be looking at.......... The American Dream...........yeah right...........its a mirage dreamt up by the top 0.1% to keep the bottom 90% producing for them.

Dunno............put the holiday snaps into Boots and never saw them again?

Oh I don't know the two Keef's cut dashing figurines when kitted out in basques, stockings and high heels..........

Singer or poet..............? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9GVk3AclEM&feature=related

If they used both of us there wouldn't be any balls getting past, there wouldn't be room! Time for a fag.........still not!

Public spending on unfunded public sector pensions is projected to rise from £4.5 billion in 2010-11 to £13.5 billion 2016-17.

Keith will make a half decent goal post!

Where abouts will this take place............?

MK11 Cortina's...................1967-1971 if I remember rightly. F-J reg.

None of your new fangled thinking Micky.................. #8. Lemon in the Armpits: Apparently some Puerto Ricans (and other citrusy fresh people) swear by this method. While I've read a few different opinions, the general belief is that you need to rub a slice of lemon in the armpit of your drinking arm before you start boozing. Out of lemons? Lime's fine. I'm not so sure about this one, but either way you'll be smelling fresh and fruity #7. World's Greatest Drunks: Now it's clearly between the Russians and Irish for being the biggest drunks, so I'll present a hangover cure from each. The Russians claim all you have to do is drink the juice squeezed from a cucumber. I don't know how you go about this, but Vodka literally means water in Russian, so who are we to second-guess them? The Irish cure? Well they're said "to bury the ailing person in moist river sand.” It's not exactly clear if they keep the head above ground, or if this is simply the easiest way to get rid of the weakest drinkers. #6. Sicilian Sausage: Now I'm pretty hesitant on this next one, but who am I to second guess the people who instituted organized crime? Apparently, Sicilians believe that all you have to do after a wild night of drinking is eat a dried bull's penis. Yep, that's it. Plain and simple. #5. Jog 'n' Lick (AKA Keef's preferred option!): Word on the street (according to BBC ) is that Native Americans would run around in the morning to get sweaty after a hard night on the village. Next step? Why the only logical thing: lick all that sweat up and spit it out, so you can get rid of all the 'poison' you'd just oozed out. #4. Kickin' it old school: Now we all learned in school how much the Ancient Greeks & Romans knew how to party, what with the bath houses, orgies, and epic festivals. Well, after a wild night of debauchery Ancient Greeks were all about a nice breakfast of sheep lungs and two owl eggs. The morning after, Romans would chow down on deep-fried canaries, which we can only assume were sold in big, family-size buckets. #3. Voodoo: While most of these require mixing together ridiculous ingredients, this hangover remedy simply requires a complete lack of logic… or lots of magic (magic trumps logic every time). Haitian voodoo people are said to recommend sticking 13 black pins in the cork of the offending bottle. Try it out, let me know how it goes. #2. Mongolian Mary: The hangover cure for heavy drinkers in outer Mongolia is "a pair of pickled sheep's eyes in tomato juice. #1. "2 Cowboys 1 Cup”: What did those lonely cowboys of the Wild West concoct to cure hangovers? A fresh, hot cup of tea? Oh, that's nice, sounds like a pleasant little remedy. Wait, they put what in it? Rabbit droppings? Yes, the best part of waking up was rabbit crap in their cup.

Merc every Friday morning!!!!!

Doesn't your Lass read these boards then foxy coz...............

Merci.................

Now you are just trying to make us lot drool Brian.......... Half a lamb.........can you send over a smell of it for our Sunday lunch!

Keeef1...........you will scare the bairns!

Read it and weep.................

Great thanks Merc............... We are especially keen on townscape photos so we can see the development of Bedlington as a market town (but not exclusively) over the years.

Taking a quick look at Portugal, as the Troika have just done, we can see what seems to be oblivious to the political and financial elite, the austerity measures alone are hurting Portugal's ability to get herself out of the mire. While the leadership seems to have capitulated and agreed to every austerity term demanded by the Troika, so they had access to bailout's, what is happening is a classic example of why austerity is simply just not enough to rebalance economies. Of course expenditure has to be reduced to sustainable levels but there needs to be a bit of leeway and some investment somewhere or the economy stagnates at best. Without growth austerity by itself is self-defeating and leads to an ever decreasing circle of debt spirals. Portugal has increased VAT as directed but actually seen the take reduce because people can't spend as domestic consumption is crumbling. Classic example of the Laffer Curve. Another example is the tax revenue figures which this year is 3.5% lower than last year. Savings applied to state expenditure during the same period…….0.7%! So 3.5% less money yet only 0.7% cut = more debt needed to stand still! Over the last year Portugal's economy has shrunk by 3.3% and following her present course I can see that only getting worse. Less revenue = more debt (bailouts) = more austerity imposed = leading to less revenue, so the circle goes on. The same sort of thing is crippling Greece and we are falling into the similar track. Having been duped into going on a debt laden spending spree, where nothing was put into increasing domestic manufacturing to satisfy that demand, we now have a totally out of sync economy and the need to restructure is urgent. The longer we leave it the more painful that restructuring becomes. We allowed the big players to export the jobs which were needed to service the boom times and now all we can look forward to is more and more cuts because economic growth and therefore revenue growth is probably out of the question.

BTW, excellent photos Vic.............. and if anyone else has any..........we are doing a heritage project and need as many as possible.

Isn't the first one the oldest seeing as the pit is behind the market place and in the second one the pit rows are?

Its like watching the old East German floor team..............