Brian Cross

Yes Vic just to impress the Poms living in the Gong

MAORI CONVENTION. 33,000 Maori meet at the Westpac Stadium for a 'Maori Are Not Stupid' convention Pita Sharples addresses the crowd.. 'We are all here today to prove to the world that Maori are not stupid, can I have a volunteer please? Hone Harawira gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. Pita asks him 'What is 15 plus 15?' After 15 or 20 seconds Hone says, 'Forty!' Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then the Maori start chanting 'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!' Pita says, 'Well since we have a huge crowd, world-wide press and global broadcast media here, I think we can give him another chance.' So he asks, 'What is 5 plus 5?' After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, 'Twelve?' Pita looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh. Everyone is disheartened and Hone looks like he's going to weep. But then the 33,000 Maori begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, 'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!' Pita, unsure whether he is now doing more harm than good eventually says, 'OK then, what is 2 plus 2? Silence hangs over the stadium. Hone closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, 'Four? Pandemonium breaks out throughout the stadium as the Maori crowd stand to a man, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream, 'Give him another chance! Give him another chance!'

I think it was in the early fifties, we lived in Wollongong N.S.W. we saw the Vulcan fly over us it was on a round the world non stop flight i can remember it what a sight and sound.

Why would trains not stop at the Station

Hope you had a gud'un 4G all the best mate

Done

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced Up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized She was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took The seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "Business trip or pleasure?†She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston." He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen Sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your Business at this convention?†"Lecturer,†she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my Personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.†"Really?†he said. "And what kind of myths are there?†"Well,†she explained, "one popular myth is that African-American men are The most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth is That Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Mexican Descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with Absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck.†Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.. "I'm Sorry,†she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't Even know your name.†"Tonto,†the man said, "Tonto Gonzales, but my friends call me Bubba".

Happy Birthday Mal i hope you are enjoying the day................

Don't hold back Symptoms, Tony p they were forced out by a far superior force and evacuated from dunkirk those brave men didn't run they came back with their allies to win

That brought back memories i had long ago put at the back of my brain ..........who was it that swapped stuff for gold fish ?

Prescription Drugs & Side Effects A woman asks her husband at breakfast time "Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?" He declines. "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. "It's this Viagra," he says. It's really taken the edge off my appetite." At lunchtime, she asks him if he'd like something. "How about a bowl of soup, homemade muffins, or a cheese sandwich?" He declines. "The Viagra," he says, "really trashes my desire for food." Come dinner time, she asks if he wants anything to eat. "Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and some scrumptious apple pie? Or maybe a rotisserie chicken or tasty stir fry?" He declines again. "No," he says, "it's got to be the Viagra. I'm still not hungry." "Well," she says, "Would you mind letting me up? I'm starving."

I reckon you all have been on Newcastle Brown

All the best Foxy hope you had a good 'un

A young woman started work in the Village Chemist Shop. She was very shy about having to sell condoms to the public. The owner was going on holiday for a couple of days and asked if she would be willing to run the shop on her own. She had to confide to him her worries abut selling condoms. "Look†he said, "My regular customers don't ask for condoms, they ask for a 310 (small); 320 (medium); or a 330 (large). The word condom is never mentionedâ€. The first day was fine, but on the second day a black guy came into the shop, put out his hand and said, "350 pleaseâ€. The girl panicked and rang her employer. She told him of her predicament. "Go back and check if he has a bucket hanging between his legs†her boss told her. She peeped through the door and saw the bucket hanging between his legs. "Yes†she said, "He's got one hanging there!†The boss replied, "Go back in there and give him $3.50, he's our window cleanerâ€.

Not working on Firefox

According to Google a Gully is simply a big Knife used years ago

Have great Birthday Hoggsie hope you enjoyed the Railway

Happy Birthday

Thanks 3G that spains it mate

What is an Aussie doing on Eurovision (Guy Sebastion) Oz is a long way from Europe

mmmmmmmm interesting

Happy Birthday lads Micky Potts and Smudgeinthebudge

It hasn't worked for me in weeks (live i mean)

I am not a badge of honour, I am not a racist smear, I am not a fashion statement, To be worn but once a year, I am not glorification Of conflict or of war. I am not a paper ornament A token, I am more. I am a loving memory, Of a father or a son, A permanent reminder Of each and every one. I'm paper or enamel I'm old or shining new, I'm a way of saying thank you, To every one of you. I am a simple poppy A Reminder to you all, That courage faith and honour, Will stand where heroes fall.