Symptoms

HPW - the search box is at the top of the page just below your username. I got a tattoo when I was 20 - quite a big elephant's head just below my navel. The inker told me to shave off the bush before he started, a quick mop-down with surgical spirit and off he went. The pain was awful but Tough Old Sym gritted his gnashers as the art progressed; Fanta looks splendid even after all these years, although he quickly grew a head of hair. The worst part of the inking was detailing the end of his trunk.

What a wonderful sight. All those New Labour losers attempting to stick it to Corbyn not realising the man is cloaked in the armour of the wider membership. What have all his detractors got in common? They all wear sharp suits, sport $100 dollar haircuts, and worst of all, wear cufflinks! It was that vain Welsh windbag Kinnockkk who started the rot ... the first Labour leader to 'proudly' wear cufflinks, not just any old cufflinks but cufflinks habitually tugged-down to show below his jacket sleeves. Thankfully, the bald git didn't have enought locks to sport the $100 dollar haircut but went for the 'poor man's' Scargill/Charlton comb over; he would have looked less ridiculous topped by a cheapo rug. This man took himself so seriously when all around him thought he was a pompous clown. Then we've got all of warcrim Blairs old bag carriers (all cufflink wearers, like their Master) slagging Corbyn off from their cushy, well paid sinecures in the City and the weapons manufacturers boardrooms; just like Kinnockkk but with more hair and better complexions. Remember what Wise Old Sym wrote in post 2 above ... "Nah, never trust a man who wears cufflinks and sports a $100 dollar haircut. My vote goes to Jeremy Corbyn ... one of the last dinosaurs."

HPW, Betty Saxe-Coburg and Gotha is what all right-thinking folks call that 'placewoman' squatting on Blighty's top chair; the placewoman (and her spawn) suckin' the Nation dry. Remember, during that first big bun fight with Fritz Betty's gang changed their Fritzy family name to a more Anglicised one (Windsor) so they could continue to rob poor old Blighty. So, Betty Saxe-Coburg and Gotha's English means The Queen's English.​ Ah, just to remember that wonderful night in July 1918 in Yekaterinburg.

Not just Levi's and Wranglers but I used to get my Ben Sherman shirts there as well. The novelty was negotiating the old cinema's sloping floor on a Sunday* morning (after a heavy night suppin' & tokin') to wander between the racks and stacks. I bought a fantastic pin-striped dishdasha (an ankle-length, collarless Arab style shirt/gown) in there. What a sight to behold, covered in my dishdasha and my Goan sandals I could have been lifted straight out of the Lawrence of Arabia movie. Ah, happy days. *back then nothing retail was open on a Sunday and I recall Nigel (the bloke who ran the place) being prosecuted in various attempts to close him down.

Just like the old days when up against Fritz: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-kent-34174822

HPW - here's a hook to snare an agent ... a bilingual book. Every alternative page in Betty Saxe-Coburg and Gotha's English juxtaposed with a Pitmatic translation. Killing two birds with one stone ... telling your tale AND keeping a local language alive (or at least on life support).

There's a huge appetite for memoirs based on now defunct industries, especially the mines and the shipyards. To gain the widest audience it's best to avoid those publishers who do things like "Town X through the ages" as they restrict the possibility of a wider readership - in a sense the stuff is only of interest to the locals. A carefully selected Literary Agent will be a mine of good advice and contacts who'll help to steer a project in the right direction ... however, the trick is to 'hook' the agent on just how interesting the project is.

Basic housekeeping ... my Uncle Arthur was a 'pump man' underground all his working life (from leaving school at 14 maybe even younger until he was 65). He started at the Algernon (West Allotment) as a boy and when that closed moved to Backworth, High Pit, and Wheatslade, although I can't remember in what order. He was always a pump man due to only having one arm ... he lost it in a train accident when he was about 6 years old on the old line through West Allotment. I'm impressed that he was able to get a job back then with that disability, although it probably helped that all the other blokes in the family worked the Algernon so maybe put in a good word to the Manager. Interesting observations about Bates and the possibility of remedial action which could reinstate it to a working pit (ditto, those big super pits down in Yorks & Notts). I suppose it would only happen if the 'balloon went up' and imports became impossible. Of course one problem would be that all the blokes with the mining expertise will all have gone by then.

HPW - make sure that any agent is a member of The Association of Authors' Agents (http://agentsassoc.co.uk/) then you'll have little to worry about getting ripped off. I'll send you a personal message with some info.

I wonder what it's like underground now; would everything be collapsed with no access? The reason I'm asking is that I watched a programme on the BBC iPlayer a couple of week ago about 'Underground Britain' where these blokes scuba dived a deep mine (it might have been a silica mine) which had been abandoned in the 1960s. It was full of water but there were no collapses and the whole place looked in tip-top condidtion with all the tackle in place ... it was if the last shift had just left! Another technical question ... when the pits shut and those cables were cut would the shafts have been filled in to its whole depth, or would they have just been capped?

GGG wrote: "There's a rule that says that no one who owns ANY part of a 43 year-old aeroplane can EVER have any excess income Maggie!" but what about Sym's Spitfire ... the one used to strafe* the Stadium of Shite? *our regular viewers will understand this ... others will have to enlist the help of the 'search' button.

2,380 have been 'topped' ... latest SS (as I still call the DWP) official figures for gimps deemed fit to work who've snuffed it shortly after having their gibblets probed by Atos and more recently by Maximus. http://www.theguardian.com/society/2015/aug/27/thousands-died-after-fit-for-work-assessment-dwp-figures

Mal wrote: "Much as it pains me I have to agree with Sym.........." Sym writes: "Poo".

Oh dear, elements of the Stasi are alive and well in the Membership Vetting Directorate. They're inviting classmates to inform on each other to weed out 'undesirables' ... it's turning into the 1930s Soviet Union or Nazi Germany: http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/aug/26/my-son-labour-witchfinder-general-politics-appeal-young-people For those like me who think Frankie Boyle is 'The Daddy' have a butchers at his regular column in the Guardian today: http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/aug/27/how-will-labour-top-losing-the-election-by-losing-its-own-leadership-contest It appears to me that Jeremy Corbyn is the only candidate proposing anything positive/new/different and thus drives the agenda - the rest only seem the react/slag off/infight.

If anything has a value, sentimental or monetary, keep the ankle biters well clear ... you know they just trash it. Let them look and touch under your supervision whilst regaling them with the family/items history. They'll thank you (when you're gone) when they tell the tales to their nippers. I'm now thankful I listened when all the wrinklies in my family told their tales; there's always a need for a repository of oral history in a family, so start them young.

Anyway, back to the thrust of this thread ... the evil Tories. Their latest wheeze is a full frontal attack on the disabled, known as 'work the gimps 'till they croke scheme'. ​

"Sumps, Sumps", as in, "Sumps you do talk rubbish ...", ... what's going on here? Those of us on the left should stick together but maybe all the vituperous abuse currently loose in the Labour Party is rubbing off on those here who should know better. Fact: All Allied land forces in France (and later in Belgium) during the early stages of both those bunfights with Fritz where under the Supreme Command of Frenchies. All history scholars agree that the blame for what happened rests, to a massive degree, on their uncertainty, doubt and timidness. What finally happened (Dunkirk) was a well-planned tactical retreat organised by the Brits and due in large measure to some incredible bravery shown by a number of 'rearguard' actions by mainly British troops. Fact: Recent research has shown the numbers of Frenchies involved in La Résistance française had been massively overblown; most Frogs kept their heads down whilst Fritz was on the prowl - I don't blame them. But the really brave Frenchies involved in the struggle against the Bosch were pretty thin on the ground even if, after the war, every other Frog claimed membership. Fact: Why is it that there's hundreds of jokes about the cowardly French unless there's some truth in the crude caricature.

I reckon the Jimmy Savile Squad must have been lurking behind the gravestones 'gathering intelligence' on some of those 1960s and 1970s popular entertainers who turned up.

You really couldn't make it up! The Frog cabin staff ran away and locked themselves in a secure compartment and left it to the Yankees and a Brit to tackle the gunman. Remember the last two big bunfights with Fritz when the Frogs scarpered and left it to the Brits and the Yankees to save their bacon. That yellow-bellied cowardice gene must run through the Frenchie DNA.

Paul ... I went to school with a lad called George (Geordie) Nesbitt, he'd be 64 now, he also has an older brother (I've forgotten his name but he posted on this Forum years ago so'll be in the member's list somewhere). Dorothy, who you mention above might be connected to the Nesbitts ... often the Census records had mis-spelt names due to the Census Enumerators mistakes on the doorstep.

The last one bites the dust ... www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-33959137 ​

What about John Trewick the footballer ... played for a number of clubs, West Brom, the Toon, and others in the late 1970s and 80s. I have a vague recollection that he might have been the son of a Bedders publican (maybe Red Lion).

Like Foxy I accepted the 'leap of faith' and went for W10 on my W7 laptop ... I'm pleased with the result. Mind, the laptop isn't connected to any peripherals like printers/scanners so I've got no issues with them not having the correct drivers to work under W10; I only use the laptop to trawl the thobnet when sitting in my kitchen. All the heavy IT stuff I do on my desktop in my study ... this beast is the one connected to all my peripherals so I don't want to cripple them by upgrading to W10 on it ... I ran the W10 'compatibility' test on my study PC and found 'driver' issues that would prevent my digitising tablet and flatbed scanner from working so I'll not upgrade. If your tackle is connected to anything DO run W10's 'compatibility' test first, then make a decision to 'stick or twist'

A Grandad of mine worked on the railways (he also at a different time was a miner) and had a black leather belt (17/8" wide ... about 47mm) onto which slipped a leather 'pad' about 6" x 7". This 'pad' was a backing piece, or protector, that went behind a carbide lamp which hung from the belt and prevented the heat from the lamp from burning his belly. I still have this belt but alas not the 'pad' ... actually I'm sitting writing this post with the said belt holding-up my 'skinny' jeans. What a belt it is!!! Thick, well worn leather, with loads and loads of buckle-pin holes (to fit different belly sizes over the decades - Grandad, Dad and then me). The belt is/was know in the family as 'the night-shift belt' 'cos my Grandad usually worked nights on the railways. The belt was also used by my Dad for whacking purposes on my arse when I'd been naughty ... I can still recall my Mum saying "Just wait 'till your Dad gets in gets the nightshift belt out". Happy days!

Just wait until all the wicked Tory cut bite deep and those protecting the 'working poor' have been properly gelded ...