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Brian Cross

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Posts posted by Brian Cross

  6. What Do You Miss?

    in History Hollow

    Posted

    Seahouses Brian well worth the drive, the only difficult thing is choosing the one you want to sit in and have your fish'n'chips, bread and tea. In fact I might just have a drive up there this week end! :fish:

    I could to it this weekend too Merlin

  12. Bedlington Heritage Fair

    in Talk of the Town

    Posted

    If it was Muslim Day, Gay rights day, Bin Laden 'Bomb every white man day' or Shag the Cabbage day HSE would dive for cover and allow these people to get on with it because they can't go against the PC brigade or the F.....G DO-F.....G-GOODERS! But when ordinary people want to help others to have a bit of fun on ONE day of the year, they are there, rearing their ugly heads. FFS! Get these people HERE to tell us to our faces, WHY we can't get on with having a bit of fun, have some happiness and create memories for our children! I could not tire of kicking these people, who are they anyway? Do they have a life? Am booncin on me chair, let me meet these people, PLEASE PLEASE let me meet these people, I have got to meet these people! Let them tell me to my face why we are NOT allowed to enjoy ourselves unless we have some perverse ideas for a 'FAMILY' day out!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!

    I am with Merlin on this one .

  18. Good Jokes: Not For The Faint-Hearted (Adult content)

    in Chat Central

    Posted · Edited by Brian Cross

    A GUY IS SITTING IN THE BAR IN DEPARTURES AT A BUSY AIRPORT.

    A beautiful woman walks in and sits down at the table next to him.

    He decides because she's got a uniform on, she's probably an

    off-duty flight attendant.

    So he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying the

    airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly.

    He leans across to her and says the Delta Airlines motto, 'We love

    to fly and it shows'.

    The woman looks at him blankly. He sits back and thinks up another

    line.

    He leans forward again and delivers the Air France motto. 'Winning

    the hearts of the world'.

    Again she just stares at him with a slightly puzzled look on her

    face.

    Undeterred, he tries again, this time saying the Malaysian Airlines

    motto. 'Going beyond expectations'.

    The woman looks at him sternly and says 'What the f@c# do you want?'

    'Ah!' he says, sitting back with a smile on his face.

    Qantas

  20. Bedlington Heritage Fair

    in Talk of the Town

    Posted

    I think so too keith.

    If Brian and Vic read this they might like to print out the PDF’s and put them up in their respective community centres or whatever?

    In fact if they PM me with address I will send them the proper leaflets……..

    If we are still on for that drink soon Brian I can give you one then?

    Look forward to the drink Malcolm and picking up one of those PDF's from you.......

  23. Good Jokes: Not For The Faint-Hearted (Adult content)

    in Chat Central

    Posted

    Two men are sitting at the bar at the top of the Empire State Building Drinking, when the first man turns to the other one and says:

    "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this

    Building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the wind around the

    Building is so intense that it carries you around the building and back

    Into the window."

    The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar,

    But says nothing.

    The second guy says, "What? Are you insane? There's no way in heck that

    Could happen!"

    "No, it's true," said the first man, "let me prove it to you."

    He gets up from the bar, jumps over the balcony and plummets toward the

    Street below. When he passes the 10th floor, the high wind whips him

    Around the building and back into the 10th floor window and he takes the

    Elevator back up to the bar. He meets the second man, who is astonished.

    "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must've been a one-time

    Fluke. That was scientifically impossible!"

    "No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again, just

    As his body hurtles towards the street, the 10th floor wind gently

    Carries him around the building and into the window. He takes the

    Elevator back to the bar.

    Once upstairs, he successfully urges his dubious fellow drinker to try

    It.

    "Well, what the heck," the second guy says, "I've seen that it works, so

    I'll try it!" He immediately jumps over the balcony - plunges downward -

    Rapidly passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors ....his body hits the

    Sidewalk with a loud "splat."

    Back upstairs, the bartender who had been silent the whole time turns to

    The first drinker, and shakes his head. He says,

    "You know, Superman, you're a real a*+*##^ * when you're drunk."

    Two men are sitting at the bar at the top of the Empire State Building Drinking, when the first man turns to the other one and says:

    "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this

    Building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the wind around the

    Building is so intense that it carries you around the building and back

    Into the window."

    The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar,

    But says nothing.

    The second guy says, "What? Are you insane? There's no way in heck that

    Could happen!"

    "No, it's true," said the first man, "let me prove it to you."

    He gets up from the bar, jumps over the balcony and plummets toward the

    Street below. When he passes the 10th floor, the high wind whips him

    Around the building and back into the 10th floor window and he takes the

    Elevator back up to the bar. He meets the second man, who is astonished.

    "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must've been a one-time

    Fluke. That was scientifically impossible!"

    "No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again, just

    As his body hurtles towards the street, the 10th floor wind gently

    Carries him around the building and into the window. He takes the

    Elevator back to the bar.

    Once upstairs, he successfully urges his dubious fellow drinker to try

    It.

    "Well, what the heck," the second guy says, "I've seen that it works, so

    I'll try it!" He immediately jumps over the balcony - plunges downward -

    Rapidly passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors ....his body hits the

    Sidewalk with a loud "splat."

    Back upstairs, the bartender who had been silent the whole time turns to

    The first drinker, and shakes his head. He says,

    "You know, Superman, you're a real a*+*##^ * when you're drunk."

    Two men are sitting at the bar at the top of the Empire State Building Drinking, when the first man turns to the other one and says:

    "You know, last week I discovered that if you jump from the top of this

    Building, by the time you fall to the 10th floor, the wind around the

    Building is so intense that it carries you around the building and back

    Into the window."

    The bartender just shakes his head in disapproval while wiping the bar,

    But says nothing.

    The second guy says, "What? Are you insane? There's no way in heck that

    Could happen!"

    "No, it's true," said the first man, "let me prove it to you."

    He gets up from the bar, jumps over the balcony and plummets toward the

    Street below. When he passes the 10th floor, the high wind whips him

    Around the building and back into the 10th floor window and he takes the

    Elevator back up to the bar. He meets the second man, who is astonished.

    "You know, I saw that with my own eyes, but that must've been a one-time

    Fluke. That was scientifically impossible!"

    "No, I'll prove it again," says the first man as he jumps. Again, just

    As his body hurtles towards the street, the 10th floor wind gently

    Carries him around the building and into the window. He takes the

    Elevator back to the bar.

    Once upstairs, he successfully urges his dubious fellow drinker to try

    It.

    "Well, what the heck," the second guy says, "I've seen that it works, so

    I'll try it!" He immediately jumps over the balcony - plunges downward -

    Rapidly passes the 11th, 10th, 9th, 8th floors ....his body hits the

    Sidewalk with a loud "splat."

    Back upstairs, the bartender who had been silent the whole time turns to

    The first drinker, and shakes his head. He says,

    "You know, Superman, you're a real a*+*##^ * when you're drunk."

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