Brian Cross

Yea when i was a kid growing up in Wollongong NSW we found witchetty grubs in old tree stumps and paper barks and we'd cook them on a spade they were OK a bit like bread dough.

What is the most way out thing you have eaten ........i think mine was oven baked sparrow or whole fish (small mullet) heads and all

Could be right there Mal but it was farging nice tho.

The boss cooked turkey fillet schnitzel for supper last night with boccochini (not sure of spelling) cheese grilled on top it was delicious.

Should a Child Witness Childbirth? (Here's your answer.) Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call. The house was very dark, so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her mother so he could see while he helped deliver the baby. Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked. Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and patted him on his bottom. Connor began to cry. The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-year-old what she thought about what she had just witnessed. Kathleen quickly responded, 'He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place........smack him again!'

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party. The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger" ..... "In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days." "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests" "What is your FIRST request ???' The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse." The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away. Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night. The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse", "But I will still kill you in two days." "What is your SECOND request ???" The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear. As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon. Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, more attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Rangers tent and spends the night. The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed. "You are indeed a man of many talents," "But I will still kill you tomorrow." "What is your LAST request ???" The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse, ....... alone." The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent. Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, Looks him square in the eye and says, Listen Very Carefully !!!! FOR.. THE... LAST... TIME.... I SAID ....... 'BRING POSSE not !*!@#'

A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her. "You have so much to live for," said the man. "I'm a sailor, and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy." With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Italy , the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the hold. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches, a bottle of red wine, and make love to her until dawn. Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection. "What are you doing here?" asked the captain. "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Italy ." "I see," the captain says. Her conscience got the best of her and she added, "Plus, he's screwing me." "He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry ."

Ten Thoughts to Ponder Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 Men have two emotions : Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich . Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years. Number 6 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals, dying of nothing. Number 5 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 4 Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00? Number 3 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. Number 2 Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers--what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow. And The Number 1 Thought - - - as someone recently said to me: "Don't worry about old age - it doesn't last that long.

Yep Bediesathome give up the secret............

You are so right Vic i know Britain is not the only country to have problems with immigrants that will never assimilate. This country (Aust) has a huge problem with boat people that board a rickety boat somewhere usually Indonesia and then try to force their way into this country,they are usually young males with no families with them i heard on the news 8 hundred have landed on Australian territory in the last 2 months. Our govt has no answer to this mainly because they are gutless and have their hands tied by the United nations. I am glad i am at my stage of life and i will never see the worst of these bad policies made by weak governments.

I blame it squarely at the feet of the now retired politicians who tried multiculturalism and when it looked liked failing slid nicely into retirement and tried to forget it, for the first time in my life the riots made me not proud of being English .

welcome Wilson

Good to hear from you Keith

Well said Keith.

Welcome Nadine ..........

We leave Aust on the 16th and get to Ncl on the 17th at 12.05 so we will miss Market Place do unfortunately, i am coming over with my son it is his 1st trip to the UK.

just a holiday Keith they are not doing a deportation yet its my cousin Alan's 60th in early October.......

lap dancing no one told me about that glad the boss staying home

sounds good to me

Bring on the revolution Merlin

Where do you guys have pint now i would like to meet up with a few of you as i will be back in the old town in about 7 weeks

Another welcome to the forum canny lass hope you enjoy it as much as i do

Enjoy the forum and welcome

I will drink to that....sorry one too many but then i am not as thrunk as dreeple pink i am

I will drink to that....