Brian Cross

i remember all of your quote Keefy and as you say we returned evey year to do the same thing regardless of bowel consequences ..............ah the memories leek show at the Percy Arms

Hi Adam i have tried West End beer and i rate it equal to Fosters lager and Fosters is crap

There was a family gathering, With all generations around the table. Mischievous teenagers put a Viagra tablet Into Grandpa's drink, And after a while, Grandpa excused himself Because he had to go to the bathroom. When he returned, however, His trousers were wet all over. 'What happened, Grandpa?' He is asked by his concerned children. 'Well,' he answered, 'I don't really know. I had to go to the bathroom. So I took it out and started to pee, But then I saw that it wasn't mine, So I put it back!'

Oh my god Keefy you are off your medication again

A simple rule from a mate of mine (Bazza) Beer before wine makes a fellow feel fine Wine before beer makes a fellow feel queer. There endeth the lesson children.

I can do thay for you Malcolm

We had small do at our place last saturday night and as you do we had a few beers, the ladies had wine and a few beers .......for food i fired up the wood heated oven and cooked a beef roast and half a lamb .......i just managed to fit the lamb in .........eveyone enjoyed themselves i think cant remember really .

Welcome Barchetta hope you enjoy the site as much as we do

Very touching Mal

Thats the Aussies for you there is always a bright side to evey situation.

Better better take it slowly mate

Oh dear Keefy are you still on your medication ?

Duz tha speak Yorkshire ? A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet. Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat." Vet: "Is it a tom?" Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it wi us." ...................................................................................... A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by. Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?" Jeweller: "Do you want it 18 carat?" Yorkshireman: "No, I want it chewin' a bone, yer daft bugger!" ..................................................................................... Bloke from Barnsley with piles asks chemist, "Nah then, lad, does tha sell arse cream?" Chemist replies, "Aye, Magnum or Cornetto?" Police have just released details of a new drug craze prevalent in Yorkshire nightclubs.Apparently, Yorkshire clubgoers have started injecting Ecstasy just above their front teeth.Police say the dangerous practice is called `E by gum

Nice to hear from you again shybedlingtonnew(ish)bie

Barry, the Aussie builder, was going through a house he had just built, with the woman who owned it. She was telling him what colours to paint each room. They went into the first room and she said, "This room to be a light blue." The builder went to to the front door and yelled out "Green side up!" As he went back she said the next room was to be red. The builder again went to the front door and called out "Green side up!" Once back with her, she said "This one to be tan." And again he went to the front door and yelled "Green side up!" The lady, very curious, said "I keep telling you different colours but, you always yell "Green side up", "What do you say that for?" "Oh, don't you worry about that," said the builder, "I've got a couple of Irishmen laying turf out front."

Yep definatly turd from da ruyyt

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started.....

Well said Keith and from me RIP Neil Armstrong .........he probably had some connections with Northumberland ?

welcome Browny hope you enjoy the site as much as we do .......

The Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise. She asked, "Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?" Maria: "Well, Señora, there are tree reasons why I wanna increaza. The first is that I iron better than you." Wife: "Who said you iron better than me?" Maria: "Jor huzban he say so." Wife: "Oh yeah?" "The second reason eez that I am a better cook than you." Wife: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?" Maria: "Jor hozban did" Wife increasingly agitated: "Oh he did, did he?" "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you in the bed." Wife, really boiling now and through gritted teeth asks, "And did my husband say that as well?" Maria: "No Señora… The gardener did." Wife: "So how much do you want ?

welcome Ed hope you enjoy the site

A government survey has shown that 91% of illegal immigrants come to Australia just so they can see their own doctor.

Before Obama was elected President he went to see Bill and Hillary for some campaign advice, at their spacious home. After drinking several glasses of iced tea, he asked Bill Clinton if he could use his personal bathroom. When he entered Clinton's private toilet, he was astonished to see that Clinton had a solid gold urinal! Wow! That afternoon, Obama told his wife, Michelle, about the urinal. "Just think,' he said, 'when I am President, I too could have a gold urinal. But I wouldn't have something so self-indulgent!" Later, when Michelle had lunch with Hillary, she told Hillary how impressed Obama had been at his discovery of the fact that, in his private bathroom, . . . . . . Bill had a gold urinal. That evening, when Bill and Hillary were getting ready for bed, Hillary smiled and said to Bill: "I found out who wee'd in your saxophone."

The wife was screaming at her husband: "Leave!! Get out of this house!" she ordered. As he was walking out the door she yelled, "And .. I hope you die a slow and painful death!" He turned around and replied "So now you want me to stay?"