Hamburger Pimp

Diddy bat! When are you coming back?

IFCIT!

Or the revamped Dun Cow, which is live and kicking of a week night, I hear.

Despite the rumours circulating, I never was a cornflake girl.

I tried this site and was told that I bore an uncanny resemblance to the American "Happy Shopper Kate Bush" chanteuse Tori Amos.

So, the lead singer of Bad Manners, Buster Bloodvessel, looks like Denzel's avatar, which is a picture of Buster Bloodvessel. Amusing stuff.

Ah, but who is the real sick man? Is it the ordinary, hard-working, internet weirdo who posts a simple request for a local barmaid to put pictures of herself dressed in fine silk lingerie, on the internet, stockings, sussies, aal the kit, or is it the businessman, in his shirt and tie, working for a company that pumps out pollution and enslaves little kiddies in sweatshops? Think on.

Post lots of pictures.

Warning - Contains strong language. Adam Buxton v NWA Warning - Doesn't contain strong language.

* makes "drinky-drinky" gesture*

Note to Alanis Morrissette: Now, that is ironic.

Hello, monsta/rasheed/skidmark/osama.

Don't be a stranger, BB. Always good to hear the latest doings from Forster Ave. Is that husband of yours still mucking about with his model trains or toy soldiers?

Do Bedlington Bears* !*!@# in the woods? *Where your first week's childcare is, I'm led to believe, absolutely free.

Thank you, Eugene Fodor.

Ooh, you editing little minx!

Was that the year the 100 Club moved to larger premises?

Seriously, it's going to remain as a golf course. This isn't difficult stuff.

Anybody been watching this excellent TV drama/comedy? Basically, Sam Tyler (played by John Simm) is a modern day chap who is hit by a car and wakes up in 1973. Although he still remembers things from the 21st Century, he is surrounded by people with attitudes and prejudices that are literally stuck in the seventies. In the current series he has had to contend with racism, homophobia, sexism, anti-Irish bigotry as well as putting up with all manner of petty in-fighting and back-biting among his colleagues. They should have called it "Life on Bedlington", eh? Yes indeedy!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!SHUTITDOROTHY!!!!!!!!!

He hasn't borrowed nearly enough on that putt. It's going to miss by about three feet on the left.

Some tinpot local radio herbert in a bomber jacket playing rubbish records and carrying out the sort of fatuous "wind up" phone calls that even Noel Edmonds would baulk at? FTS.

Southampton FC are to pull down a statue recently erected in honour of one of their greatest players, Ted Bates. Story here The reason? It's bliddy rubbish. Look at his diddy legs!

Hello Stu. Top End or Station? Toon or Mackem? Lager or Guinness?

How old? Oh, and hello.