Denzel

Bliddy hope not.

Got any Guru Josh?

The North usually - Wharton is OK, but couldn't drink there all the time. No other decent bars in Bedlington.

I was being flippant, I do apologise. There's bed-making, hoovering and polishing to be taken into account as well.

That's hardly the Dunkirk spirit now is it?

And Miss Kattie must be your secret name. I knew you fancied me.

Rack off Scott.

There's a large number of LCL cans that have gone green. I fear 'Swampy' and his hairy chums are winning.

Eh? What's up?

Too late, the place is over-run with unsuitable names like 'Britney', 'Chelsea', 'Jordan' and 'Derek'.

This must be the safest Labour seat in the country.

Ginola was well into yours!

I've been in the Bull about 3 times in 6 months!

1. Open fridge. 2. Remove bottle. 3. Open bottle. 4. Pour into glass. There; you should get at least A 2:1 if you follow those instructions.

Better check your glove compartment then.

Nepotism. AGAIN.

You planning on adopting some poor bairns when you've married your boyfriend? You're a sick man.

Let me guess, Mr Neck rambled incoherently about Steven Gerrard for a bit?

You know where it's at homeboy.

Hot to trot.

All Mr Neck-related tales are funny. Fact.

We'll have a whip-round. You better make sure you haven't left Peter Falconio's wallet on the back seat.

Extraneous information surely? You're such a name-dropper Ms Hair.

What gans on?

I hope the spelling on your business plan was a darn sight better to Mr D!