Denzel

You looked damn foxy walking down the street the other day!

Well quite.

That's the announcement proudly displayed on a blackboard outside Bedlington's premier youthclub, The Red Lion. Can anyone decipher this mystical code?!

I knew you were going to say that.

I had a grand time, hats off to Mr Neck.

Now there's a thought....

You must have the constitution of an ox!

We know that Mr Neck.

Very true, but the choice of a country lane as venue would suggest that it's not really cybersex.

Yeah, a night with Velma and Ms Hair texting their respective squeezes all night. Top bombing.

Vegetarian nonsense - the only known cure for a hangover is a full English, with extra black pudding.

Better tell Velma where we'll be so she can 'accidentally' bump into us.

It's a lot safer than the real thing

If this is cybersex, I love it.

All set for your birthday bash tomorrow?

Peanut butter and banana - works for me everytime.

Mr Darn, you are my very first cyber-pal. Are you wearing any knickers?!

Also playing at the Tyne Theatre on 29th November. Life is peachy.

I saw NUFC's midfield dynamo Scott 'Scotty' Parker yesterday, driving a particularly mean looking silver Merc. He looks like a liddle fella.

Howay then Mr Darn - you'll have to invite the lads on a fishing trip!

True, I use a Heath Robinson system involving flags, smoke signals and a waterwheel.

If it's on TV then it's true Dave. Simple as that.

Thanks for pointing that out you spluttering buffoon.